If you’ve ever been to Las Vegas you’ll know that the environment is nearly intolerable on so many levels. Everyone’s first day here is total sensory overload. Wandering through a Hotel/Casino lobby is like taking a bunch of toddler toys, taping the noise and light making buttons down, and then taping those to your head. It’s like being in house of mirrors except that the mirrors are gameshows.
There is minor respite in the back hallways to rooms and shops. They tend to be a tad less crowded, not smoky, and quiter, quiet like a mall during Christmas season. Oh yeah, you’re still in Las Vegas, so don’t expect a temple. Caesar’s though, smells weird. In the hallways leading to the rooms, especially on the ground floor. For the past three nights I’ve been trying to figure out what those smells are. My best description involves a combination of chocolate, chlorine and circus peanuts. It’s damn awful. It’s not scrunch your nose up awful, but it’s pervasive, mild and really off-putting. Clearly it’s noticeable, even after the somatosensory assault that is the casino floor.
I could rehash descriptions of the other weirdnesses of this place, but I’m going to try and be positive. I’ve got tickets to Ka tonight and the Caesar’s concierge assures me my $170 bucks is for great seats.
“We always get the best seats,” insert (for every broke-ass hipster that comes through in the off-season)
Things are good, if not maddeningly exhausting.
Oh and the ever-so-inviting jacuzzi, beat and boiled the hell out of me last night. I still couldn’t be in it for more than half an hour. I felt horrible (emotionally) afterwards because of the waste of hot water.
I’m saddened that the terrorists hit NY rather than NV. It’s like my friend Chris Derrick used to say about bad beer, “The best thing you can do with [Vegas] is pour that shit out in the street.”